Tuesday, August 23, 2011

East Coast: Grow A Pair!

OK, living in California, I'm around earthquakes all the time.  They get the heart beating, you chuckle nervously and then you finish your tuna salad sandwich.

I also get it that it is different.  They don't get many earthquakes back east.  It's like when we get a tornado in California.  It ain't normal.

You mention that some guy in a trailer park lost his Rubbermade shed, and you move on.

Listening to the wall-to-wall coverage of the 5.9 earthquake that hit the east coast, you'd think the place had been leveled.  Mass destruction, gas mains spewing columns of fire, children and their puppies fried to a crisp -

Earthquake rocks East Coast

Is it time to consider earthquake insurance?

Earthquake causes venue evacuation

And the greatest disaster of them all

Earthquake interrupts President Obama's golf game

EVERY cable news network was running nothing but earthquake news, even Fox Business. Unless the NYSE had been crushed under a pile of rubble, why in the hell were they covering this?

One of the talking head bimbetts was all a-flutter with this news - "The White House will be releasing a statement on the earthquake. We're not sure if it will be in person, or via a press release, but we'll let you know when it happens."

I can hardly wait.  "Uhm, nuthin' happened.  No injuries, little damage, lots of soiled panties.  The President will release a comprehensive plan to address the soiled panties dilemma after he finishes the back nine."

Oh, how I long for news on the Kim Kardashian wedding...

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5 comments:

  1. It is kinda funny watching the news people trying to make this into a bigger story than it actually is and I love that the White house feels the need to release a statement

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  2. Chief, sometimes real life news can be confused with <a href="http://www.theonion.com/>the Onion - America's Finest News Source</a>. The news videos are priceless.

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  3. It _has_ generated some pretty funny one-liners...

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  4. Any place on earth that has a weather disaster or other type of disaster that generally does not happen there is at far greater risk then a location where those events are common. A hurricane in Southern California would wipe out most homes due to the flood and mudslides. An F5 tornado in Southern California would kill half a million people but in the midwest it would probably just destroy some farmers corn harvest.

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  5. Trust me, an F5 will wipe out anything that isnt under ground.... An above ground storm shelter would be leveled and more than a farmer would be lost.... But I get your point.

    In regards to the hurricane that "ravaged" the east coast this past weekend, I would say that your post applies as well.

    Seriously - an F1 and FEMA needs to bail everyone out? Really? I say that they should pay God for the much needed bath for that cesspool...

    Pearls

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